06-14-2015, 12:51 AM
Axe wasn't the sharpest axe in the drawer, but he tried the hardest. While most axes only took one or two swings to sever a limb, Axe worked tirelessly to sever those limbs more bloodily than the others. His massacres eventually won him a scholarship to Jesus college in Oxford. He got married, found his wife cheating on him, murdered his wife and her gigolo, and finished school. When the bodies were found, Jesus gave him a high-five and Axe died. Axe's cousin has been posing as him for three years.